Mad Atoms

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  • Worm Miller
    1

    In 1957, Worm tragically drowned at camp while counselors were inconsiderately having sex. Or so everyone thought. Ambiguously undead, Worm vengefully returned decades later and has been happily killing sexy idiots ever since. He's fought Corey Feldman and Freddy Krueger and gone into space. He hopes someday to fight Michael Meyers and a Predator.

  • Tim Saccardo
    2

    Tim Saccardo is an LA-based comedy writer, director, and improviser. His credits include the TBS sitcom 10 Items or Less, the Huffington Post's Wikipedia parody site Dickipedia.org, and MTV's upcoming animated sketch show Popzilla. He also frequently writes and performs at the Upright Citizens Brigade Theatre and their website UCBcomedy.com

  • Becky Bain
    3

    Becky likes to scuba dive, sky dive, make movies, drink fancy wine and travel. But all of those hobbies are pretty expensive, so she usually just sticks to writing. Words are cheap.

  • Hillel Aron
    4

    Hillel enjoys playing racquetball, eating steak, and reading about the American civil war. You can see him write about politics at www.dipdive.com. You can also find him on facebook and tell him how funny he is.

  • Geoffrey Golden
    5

    Geoffrey began his life watching The Muppets, and he'll die watching The Muppets.  He's written for Cracked, Warner Bros., the New York Television Festival, and has his own site called Trophy Bomb.  He loves both Capcom and Marvel equally, and wonders why they have to fight so much?

  • Michelle Lewis
    6

    Michelle was raised in the South, where she was taught "if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all." So, instead, she writes.

  • DEVELOPMENT HELL
    EVERYTHING ABOUT LOVE I LEARNED FROM DISNEY
    09 October 2009 / Writer: Michelle Lewis / Artist: J.R. Baldwin
    Each of these princesses got her happily ever after. And, dammit, I will too.
  • MADATOMS PERSONALS
    FOR LOVE OR FOR MONEY?
    01 July 2009 / Writer: Michelle Lewis / Artist: Marek Haiduk
    It's probably for money.
  • DEVELOPMENT HELL
    CREATE YOUR OWN REALITY SHOW
    18 August 2009 / Writer: Michelle Lewis / Artist: Edwin Servaas
    Got a big pitch meeting coming up? Choose a statement from each column to create your own unique reality show premise.
  • MADATOMS PERSONALS
    GETTING LAID IS ABOUT TIMING
    24 April 2009 / Writer: Michelle Lewis / Artist: Ilona Marta Iwańska
    A guide to hitting on chicks. At least, this chick.
  • LA SURVIVAL GUIDE
    DANCER PROFILING
    19 March 2009 / Writer: Michelle Lewis / Artist: Clayton Hauck
    You can tell if a man is a good dancer just by looking at him. At least, I can.
  • SPLOOGED
    I’M AN INTERNET PORN STAR
    18 December 2008 / Writer: Michelle Lewis / Artist: Ruediger Beckmann
    At least, I’m pretty sure…
  • LA SURVIVAL GUIDE
    THANKS, MOM AND DAD
    03 February 2009 / Writer: Michelle Lewis / Artist: Andréa Cerqueira
    Millenialism. Who knew being royally fucked up would pay off so nicely?
  • MADATOMS PERSONALS
    MY QUEST FOR CRAIGSLIST LOVE
    10 March 2009 / Writer: Michelle Lewis / Artist: Raphael Almeida
    Is not nearly as pathetic as everyone else’s. Thank God.
  • MADATOMS PERSONALS
    WHY I AM CALLING IN SICK
    08 January 2009 / Writer: Michelle Lewis / Artist: Lauren Albert
    A true story. Although it is not the one I will tell my boss.
  • LA SURVIVAL GUIDE
    THE BEST BIKINI WAX IN LOS ANGELES
    17 November 2008 / Writer: Michelle Lewis / Artist: Pavel Kiselev
    And I bet you want her number? Too bad.
  • MADATOMS PERSONALS
    PEOPLE CAN CHANGE
    26 March 2009 / Writer: Michelle Lewis / Artist: Mireia Grau
    Sexes.
  • MADATOMS PERSONALS
    YOU MADE ME WET
    02 April 2009 / Writer: Michelle Lewis / Artist: Christine Day Lorico
    Oh wait. Nevermind. That’s just my $2k titanium MacBook.
  • MADATOMS PERSONALS
    DATING SOMEONE “SPECIAL”
    08 February 2010 / Writer: Michelle Lewis / Artist: Adam Kurs
    I wondered if I could do it. Then I realized I already had. A lot.
  • POLITICALLY ERECT
    SOUTHERN PEOPLE ARE SICK
    12 December 2008 / Writer: Michelle Lewis / Artist: Darron Laessig
    Who needs Dr. Kevorkian when you have Dr. Jenkins?
  • SPLOOGED
    DIRTY TALK
    15 January 2009 / Writer: Michelle Lewis / Artist: Caitlin Worthington
    Isn't as fun when it's coming from a 7 year old.
  • LA SURVIVAL GUIDE
    MOLESTERS: THEY’RE JUST LIKE US
    30 December 2008 / Writer: Michelle Lewis / Artist: Roxie Vizcarra
    A minor problem becomes a major obsession.
  • MADATOMS PERSONALS
    THE FAKE PENIS, DEMYSTIFIED
    16 December 2009 / Writer: Michelle Lewis / Artist: Keaton Johnson
    What does the object he holds in front of his crotch say about a man?
  • MADATOMS PERSONALS
    ALL THE LONELY PEOPLE
    12 November 2008 / Writer: Michelle Lewis / Artist: Katherina Velásquez
    Where do they all hang out?
  • MADATOMS PERSONALS
    LOVE LIFE FAIL
    01 May 2009 / Writer: Michelle Lewis / Artist: Dave Collinson
    Pimpin' ain't easy. This time, I blame it on technology.
  • MADATOMS PERSONALS
    A SCREENSHOT IS WORTH 1,000 WORDS
    04 November 2008 / Writer: Michelle Lewis / Artist: Jonathan Jacobsen
    So shut the hell up already.
  • BIGGIE VS. TUPAC
    IN MTV WE TRUST
    08 December 2008 / Writer: Michelle Lewis / Artist: John O Connell
    The Hills proves people in LA are idiots. And that people outside of LA are even bigger idiots.
  • ALL FOR ROFL
    ADULTS THESE DAYS
    17 March 2009 / Writer: Michelle Lewis / Artist: Damien C.
    How can you expect me to respect my elders when they’re sending me 20 “ninja attacks” a day?
  • ALL FOR ROFL
    THEY SAY BUSH DID COKE. THEY KNOW YOU DID.
    16 December 2008 / Writer: Michelle Lewis / Artist: Gabriele Chiapparini
    Tag, you're fucked.
  • MADATOMS PERSONALS
    THE LOWER HALF OF LA MEN
    11 November 2008 / Writer: Michelle Lewis / Artist: Barnaby Ward
    I’m not talking about penises.
  • LA SURVIVAL GUIDE
    OH, YOU CITY OF (LUCIFER) ANGELS
    21 October 2008 / Writer: Michelle Lewis / Artist: Geoff Moore
    If Mother Theresa lived in this city she would have become a televangelist.
  • MADATOMS PERSONALS
    LIFE IS NOT A TRIP TO THE BATHROOM
    12 January 2009 / Writer: Michelle Lewis / Artist: Gabriele Chiapparini
    Unless you’re packing an 8ball. In which case, I’m sure you have plenty of girls around and can stop texting me.
  • DEVELOPMENT HELL
    THE REAL DANGERS OF GOSSIP GIRL
    09 February 2009 / Writer: Michelle Lewis / Artist: Valentine Gallardo
    The AFA warns it will lead to teenage immorality. They don’t, however, warn it will leave you drunk and stranded on the Upper East Side. They should. ‘Cause that can happen too.
  • LIVING THE DREAM
    JOEY FATONE IS ACTUALLY PRETTY COOL
    06 March 2009 / Writer: Michelle Lewis / Artist: Edwin Servaas
    Or, at least, cool enough that to pretend that he isn’t Joey Fatone.
  • LA SURVIVAL GUIDE
    DONDE ESTA LA FARMACIA, MATE?
    30 October 2008 / Writer: Michelle Lewis / Artist: David G. Osnaya
    We are Europe's Mexico.
  • Rick Paulas
    7

    Rick Paulas has never written a serious thing in his life, some of which can be found at ESPN The Magazine, McSweeney's, Radar Magazine, Deadspin, and other nonsensically-named websites. In short: If you'll pay, he'll write.

  • Clem Rorsch
    8

    Clem Rorsch aka Ryan Sandoval is a writer and comedian based in Los Angeles, with articles published in Hustler, Slap Skateboard Magazine, and Surf Shot Digital Magazine, for which he also acts as copy editor. He contributes regularly to Mad Atoms, and writes and directs videos for the online sketch collective weaknights.com

  • Kirk Pynchon
    9

    Kirk Pynchon was born a poor black child. He enjoys skinny-skiing and going to bullfights on acid. He also listens to Tito Puente albums until four in the morning.  In his spare time Kirk enjoys ripping off lines from movies and pretending they are his own.

  • Snuffy Johnson
    10

    Snuffy Johnson was born the son of poor parents in Queens, then opened a chain of dry-cleaning stores on the East side of Manhattan.  He has been married to his wife Weezy for almost thirty years, and they have a son, Lionel, who disappointed him by marrying the daughter of the honky next door.