Junior Owens lives inside a protective force field of sarcasm.Unfortunately said force field does not take the place of wearing rubbers, which he had to learn the hard way.
Haphestus Foster
12
Haphestus Foster threw away the tiny vestige of credibility he had as a reporter and photographer with the Stars and Stripes newspaper to waste untold thousands of dollars on a screenwriting degree at USC, where he literally pays people to tell him his work sucks. He has a deep knowledge of cheeses and has been to Antarctica.
Alexandra Wayne
13
Alexandra is a screenwriter living in Los Angeles, which means she spends most of her time reading and writing coverage for your scripts. She asks that you please stop writing thinly veiled rehashings of your teenage angst disguised as screenplays about vampires.
Alex D. Reid
14
Alex D. Reid flosses every night and likes reading about serial killers. Contact him here.
Ben Siemon
15
Ben drove from Phoenix to LA in a 2006 puke-green Pontiac Vibe, and never looked back. Ben is a writer, improviser, and performer that can be seen weekly at the Upright Citizen's Brigade Theatre LA. Ben also contributes to the Black Eyed Peas website "DipDive.com", and has a nose that is probably bigger than yours.
Jack McCready
16
Jack likes beer, Heavy Metal, and weird porn – usually in that order. He is a part time actor and a mediocre screenwriter. Most days (and nights) he feels like a two dollar whore on nickel night – and likes it.
LA SURVIVAL GUIDE
DON’T DRINK BONG WATER
13 July 2009 / Writer:
Jack McCready
/ Artist:
Zachary Zezima
And please don't eat the bong either.
LA SURVIVAL GUIDE
GAYS THROW THE BEST WEDDINGS
27 May 2009 / Writer:
Jack McCready
/ Artist:
Jana De Laet
Would you expect anything less than fabulous?
LA SURVIVAL GUIDE
WAKE N’ BAKE
29 June 2009 / Writer:
Jack McCready
/ Artist:
Martin Stranka
Because you're basically high when you wake up anyways.
DEVELOPMENT HELL
WHY VIN DIESEL IS RICH AND FAMOUS
22 April 2009 / Writer:
Jack McCready
/ Artist:
Sean Metcalf
It's your fault, America.
LA SURVIVAL GUIDE
SLEAZELESS ON THE SUNSET STRIP
21 April 2009 / Writer:
Jack McCready
/ Artist:
Micael Póvoa
Welcome to the Starbucks jungle.
Jon Sullivan
17
Jon Sullivan recently moved from Arkansas, and now lives with a family of sea lions in a cave on the Oregon coast. The cave is cold and dark, the smell is dreadful, and the noise of reverberated barking is blaring and constant. Still beats living in the South.
Mark Harris
18
Mark Harris is the token black guy and is good at it. After all, he's been the token black guy writing for websites like PopMatters, About.com, Napster, and even his own site, BlackHorrorMovies.com. So, don't any of you ambitious Negroes get any ideas about invading his turf; there can be only one.
S.H. Blannelberry
19
Born on the 4th of July, S.H. Blannelberry was once a swinger of birches. Until the forest burned down. And, although his Fireworks Display Operator Certification has been unceremoniously revoked following the accident, he still retains his manhood (in a glass jar, on his nightstand).
Matt Manser
20
Matt Manser is a writer/comedian based in Los Angeles. He is the head writer for "Big News," a weekly topical sketch show at IO West, writes sketches for shows at the UCB Theater, and writes videos for UCBComedy.com. Oh, and he has also written for CMT's "Trick My Truck."