Haphestus Foster threw away the tiny vestige of credibility he had as a reporter and photographer with the Stars and Stripes newspaper to waste untold thousands of dollars on a screenwriting degree at USC, where he literally pays people to tell him his work sucks. He has a deep knowledge of cheeses and has been to Antarctica.
Clem Rorsch
12
Clem Rorsch aka Ryan Sandoval is an LA-based writer, sketch performer, and stand up who sometimes wears manicured facial hair. He has performed at such shows as Not Too Shabby, D+D's Joke Center, and Acid Reflux Hour. He currently studies improv at the UCB Theater, and can be seen in the sketch collective Weak Nights.
Geoffrey Golden
13
Geoffrey began his life watching The Muppets, and he'll die watching The Muppets. He's written for Cracked, Warner Bros., the New York Television Festival, and has his own site called Trophy Bomb. He loves both Capcom and Marvel equally, and wonders why they have to fight so much?
Matt Manser
14
Matt Manser is a writer/comedian based in Los Angeles. He is the head writer for "Big News," a weekly topical sketch show at IO West, writes sketches for shows at the UCB Theater, and writes videos for UCBComedy.com. Oh, and he has also written for CMT's "Trick My Truck."
Michelle Lewis
15
Michelle was raised in the South, where she was taught "if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all." So, instead, she writes.
Johnny Highland
16
Johnny Highland was raised in Orange County and officially moved into the Heart of Darkness (LA) in 2003. He writes and produces comedy videos for the Internet, which is impressive because it's not like anyone can do that. He spends his days working on a late night talk show, and watches an unfortunate amount of reality TV.
Artie Peterson
17
Artie is the editor of the MadAtoms blog and constantly gets called into the boss's office to get yelled at for the filth that's posted here. He's from Los Angeles (Glendale), so punk police are afraid of him.
Sabrina Cognata
18
Sabrina Cognata is a writer and a thinker. Since thinking and writing pays next to nothing she opted to fuck her way to the top. Tragically, she only fucks muscle heads and miscreants. Her big plans for 2009 are writing and Brazilian AIDS
SPLOOGED
ERECTION CORRECTION
26 August 2008 / Writer:
Sabrina Cognata
/ Artist:
Daniel Henigman
How my dog's penis ruined an Irish holiday...
MADATOMS PERSONALS
FIVE SIGNS I’LL ALLOW YOU TO RAPE ME
13 August 2008 / Writer:
Sabrina Cognata
/ Artist:
Adithya Zen
Sometimes when a girl says no she means pin me down and fuck me…
LA SURVIVAL GUIDE
THERE’S NO SUCH THING AS SEXY SHITTING
30 July 2008 / Writer:
Sabrina Cognata
/ Artist:
Sam White
Girls poop? Who knew?
LA SURVIVAL GUIDE
I’M LA FAT
05 December 2008 / Writer:
Sabrina Cognata
/ Artist:
Giulio Iurissevich
I never knew I was thin until I got out of Los Angeles.
LA SURVIVAL GUIDE
GYM DANDY
30 September 2008 / Writer:
Sabrina Cognata
/ Artist:
Adam Hendershott
Yes, you’re probably one of these idiots at the gym.
POLITICALLY ERECT
TERRORIST TRAINING
11 November 2008 / Writer:
Sabrina Cognata
/ Artist:
Girda Safitri
Everyone I know avoids 9-11 jokes except for my Middle-Eastern best friend.
SPLOOGED
BLOW IN HER FACE
22 May 2008 / Writer:
Sabrina Cognata
/ Artist:
eZellison
It's copy from an old cigarette ad. I swear.
LA SURVIVAL GUIDE
WHAT THE FUCK WENT ON LAST NIGHT?
08 October 2008 / Writer:
Sabrina Cognata
/ Artist:
Polly Steab
If you plan to get rip roaringly drunk, there are going to be consequences, but why should they be your problem?
LA SURVIVAL GUIDE
LIBATION LOGIC: A GUIDE FOR THE LADIES
28 May 2008 / Writer:
Sabrina Cognata
/ Artist:
Henry Yasas
Before you get drunk know what you’re getting into…
DEVELOPMENT HELL
RETARD ROMANCE
04 September 2008 / Writer:
Sabrina Cognata
/ Artist:
Nil Ultra
Does anyone want to have to think about retards banging?
POLITICALLY ERECT
BEST IN SHOW
10 October 2008 / Writer:
Sabrina Cognata
/ Artist:
Sean Metcalf
If at first you don’t succeed, enter a contest you just can’t lose
THUG LIFE
HOLLYWOOD AFTER-HOURS
16 June 2008 / Writer:
Sabrina Cognata
/ Artist:
Adam Hendershott
Impractical advice on what to do for fun in L.A. after last call…
MADATOMS PERSONALS
BANGING MR. BEAN
25 July 2008 / Writer:
Sabrina Cognata
/ Artist:
Eduard Mirica
Don't be the victim of fucking an ugly person.
DEVELOPMENT HELL
THE TMZ TRAGEDY
15 September 2008 / Writer:
Sabrina Cognata
/ Artist:
Brandy Eve Allen
If I wanted to see non-famous girls being drunk idiots, I would watch Girls Gone Wild.
LIVING THE DREAM
DEAR LADIES IN LOS ANGELES
08 September 2008 / Writer:
Sabrina Cognata
/ Artist:
Deniz Uzunoglu
This is more than just an open letter...more of a cry for help.
MADATOMS PERSONALS
LA DATING: A COMPOST HEAP OF TREASURE
02 July 2008 / Writer:
Sabrina Cognata
/ Artist:
Adam Hendershott
The gene pool here is shallow, like my Louboutin shoes and Louis Vuitton purse.
DEVELOPMENT HELL
THIS WOMAN’S TAKE ON SEX AND THE CITY
02 June 2008 / Writer:
Sabrina Cognata
/ Artist:
Marcus J. Ranum
There are a ton of things I do not understand about popular culture and Sex and the City is one of them.
POLITICALLY ERECT
CHERTOFF FORCED TO MOONLIGHT AS NOSFERATU
02 July 2008 / Writer:
Sabrina Cognata
/ Artist:
Hillel Aron
Recession has forced U.S. Secretary of Homeland Security Michael Chertoff to take on a second job- a Nosferatu impersonator at Universal Studios.
Saryn Chorney
19
Saryn is an entertainment journalist and creative writer. She's the kind of chick who seems to have her shit together, but is really a hypomanic nymphet on the sly. Saryn hails from the WASP-y state of Connecticut and is a recent LA-transplant (via NYC). She has an encyclopedic memory and is a psychic friend to felines everywhere.
Randy Crenshaw
20
Randy Crenshaw's largely foolish belief that he will succeed in this industry stems entirely from a single incident in high school where he came up with the exact premise to Quantum Leap without ever having seen an episode of that show. He's been to the top of both the real Eiffel Tower in Paris and the ½ scale replica in Las Vegas.