SPLOOGED
ANGRY PORN ACTORS
- 12 March 2010 12:34pm / Writer: Kirk Pynchon / Artist: Sean Metcalf / Views: 26238
Is there some sort of fetish out there for porn actors to be pissed off while they’re fucking? If there is then I am definitely missing something. Cause when I see a porn of a guy yelling and screaming and foaming at the mouth while he’s banging a hot porn actress all I can think is, “Dude, chill the fuck out.”
And I’m not talking about slapping ass and pulling hair. That’s just good clean American fun – the Reverend at your local church will tell you that. I’m talking about this general sense of rage that some of these guys have while they are having sex with a hot chick. What gives? Who are they pissed off at?
What’s with all the bile and venom? What’s with all the insults? I’m all for the dirty talk but yelling, “fuck you bitch” at the woman who is riding you Reverse Cowgirl is really unnecessary. I’m pretty sure that in that specific situation a “thank you?" is the appropriate response. I could be wrong but I’m pretty sure that’s what Miss Manners advises.
Maybe it’s just me, maybe I’m a little out there or different or just plain crazy, but I am usually happy when I’m fucking. No, strike that – I’m downright giddy when I’m fucking.
I’m ready to burst into a goddamn song when I’m fucking, and I can’t stand musicals. Sex is when I’m at my absolute happiest. I can’t imagine being angry about that. Even if the sex was bad I wouldn’t be as pissed off as these guys. Why are these dillweeds so full of ire? They’re getting paid to fuck. Are you kidding me? They should be grinning ear-to-ear everyday they wake up in the morning. The first thing they should say to themselves when they get up is, “My Lord Jesus Christ, thank you for giving me the honor of receiving a blowjob from two sisters for this evening’s shoot. Every day is a gift.”
Look, I understand the frustration of doing a job day in and day out. But it’s not like they work at Starbucks – then I could see the need to be angry. But when your weekly paycheck stub says, “Payment for plowing hot chick”, you really should ease up on the rage meter. Cause you know what my weekly paycheck stub says? “Services rendered.”
I’m the one that should be angry. I’m getting truly fucked.